Skip to main content

The Secret Keeper

This is what my pseudonym should be actually. I am the best you could find.

If anybody entrusts me with a secret, they can rest assured that it will never be revealed unless and until they expressly ask me to.

On the one hand, this takes your credibility way up and your esteem in everybody’s eyes is always high. On the other, it means that you can frequently find yourself in really tricky situations and your acting skills are tested to the limits.

Sometimes it becomes really burdensome. You know something serious about somebody. You are not supposed to know it. So each time you interact with them or refer to them in interactions with others, you have to remember to NOT know that secret about them and tailor all your reactions accordingly.

Sometimes the secret-teller tells you that you are the only one who ‘knows’ and asks you to seal your lips. So you guard that secret diligently. Then some day you find that the secret-teller himself / herself has been telling it to others and one of those people, who evidently can’t keep secrets, shares it with you. Then you have to pretend as if it’s the first time you are hearing it. It’s very annoying when that happens. I have unnecessarily borne the burden for so long ! Usually I confront the secret-teller and tell them off.

Once there was this secret-teller who told a secret to many people, including me. They told each person that they were ‘the only one who knew’. The secret-teller lost track of the people with whom this secret had been shared. So, once, when the secret-teller started telling me the secret, I started giggling and this person felt offended that I was giggling. Then I pointed out that they had already told it to me once before and I also rattled off the names of five other people with whom the secret-teller had shared the secret in utmost confidence and who had shared it with me ! The expression on the secret-teller’s face was priceless :)

I am the preferred secret keeper for so many people that if I were to erase all of them from my memory, so much space would be freed up that I could store the entire Encyclopaedia Britannica there and some more !

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

How NOT to compère a function

Recently I attended an awards ceremony. It was a grand function with a huge audience in attendance. Many awards were given and some speeches too. The compère was, unintentionally, terribly funny !


In this function, when the compère announced the first award winner, he announced, “Please welcome on stage Mr. X (pause) married to (pause) wife Mrs. X (pause) from 1977 and successfully (pause) completed 32 years of (pause) married life…” I had tears in my eyes from laughing too hard :D


Later, the same compère, while telling the audiences about a certain award winner, said, “…he is married (pause) to wife Mrs. Z (pause) and enjoys playing with his (pause) children K and M. His favourite (pause) holiday destination is (pause) the beaches (pronounced as ‘bitches’) of (pause) Goa” I nearly died choking with laughter for this one !


In the 45 minutes that he was on stage he was responsible for much hilarity due to his totally inappropriate commentary. I, of course, laughed my guts out and what cou…

Belgaum Snapshots

On popular demand (= request from (possibly) the only reader of this blog), we interrupt the broadcast of the UK diaries to post about the short work-vacation trip to Belgaum. For those interested and waiting with bated breath (!) for the last instalment of the UK diaries, it shall be broadcast after this post…I promise !

I am currently on a short trip to Belgaum to conduct a theatre workshop for kids aged 8 to 15 years. I had never been to Belgaum before. So this has been a very interesting experience.
Here are some (word, not photograph) snapshots from the trip.
*******
The first thing that struck me as I reached here was the very different way in which everybody spoke Marathi. The accent is distinctly Kannada and the words and sounds are very well rounded. In Pune-Mumbai we speak in quite a sharp manner…crisply cut sounds et al. Also, there is a fun way of combining the last two words (usually the verbs, in Marathi) of a sentence.
I learnt that almost 80% of the population of Belgaum i…