These days I am hooked to a TV Show called ‘Lie To Me’. It is based on a scientific research done on micro-facial expressions and body language to detect lies. In this show the protagonist plays the part of the scientist who established this new method of lie detection. He heads a group where he, along with other people who work for him, takes up jobs of lie detection. The show is well made and I love to know about what signals the scientist read and relate to which emotion. It also has an element of case-solving, like in a detective show, and I have always had great inclination towards mysteries and crime solving – books, films and TV shows.
As a child, in fact, right through my teenage years, I had intense hatred for lies and liars. ‘Little white lies’ were also not spared of it. To me the equation was pretty straight-forward and, thinking about it today, rigid. To Lie = to commit murder. That was the seriousness and gravity of the ‘crime’ for me.
As I grew up I accepted the utility of ‘little white lies’, although a bit grudgingly. I learnt to discern between, what I term as, ‘harmful & hurtful’ lies and ‘protective’ lies. So, to me, lying to harm or hurt somebody or lying to withhold something that rightfully belongs to somebody else was the ‘harmful & hurtful’ variety, while lying to protect somebody from harm was the ‘protective’ variety.
Gradually I became non-judgemental about it. I can even tell ‘little white lies’ now and then. Yet my personal preference is always ‘truth’. I have hurt a lot of people on account of this habit, I am sure.
Along the way I have realised that most people don’t consider ‘what’ is said if it is said ‘in a good way’. But, then I felt that this also amounted to pretence. So I pondered over it longer, observed more, and learnt that, the crucial element is my intention. Then it became a lot within control and easier too. If my intention is not to hurt somebody, and I make it clear and still speak the truth, for truth’s sake, and say it softly (as opposed to harshly), then speaking the truth would be welcomed and beneficial for the other person.
So now I follow this and ensure that I speak the truth. But lies still intrigue me and thus the fascination for the show about lie detection techniques.
Oh, and look at the irony of the situation…I am an actress (or female actor, to be politically correct) and have to lie convincingly on-stage ! :)
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